Smothering Parenting: Life Under a Microscope

Slight, porcelain-skinned Margaret, a 33-year-old attorney specializing in family law, grew up with a lawyer father who loved heated discussions, always insisting Margaret argue with him and defend her positions. Unfortunately, he never allowed her to win, badgering her until she capitulated.

At age nine, Margaret began reading a book about a veterinarian, which her father covertly confiscated since he wanted her to be a doctor, not a vet. When Margaret asked where the book went, her father responded, “What book?” When she was 12, Margaret developed a taste for bland foods — vanilla ice cream, white bread and potatoes — so her father endlessly shoved the spicy foods he preferred under her nose. As 16-year-old Margaret was writing her college-application essays, her father grabbed them, read them disapprovingly, sat down at the kitchen table and rewrote them. When 17-year-old Margaret was packing for college, her father began yanking clothes out of her suitcase, telling her exactly what and how to pack.